a day of realization...

Well it is the day after weigh in day and I am feeling a little better. I am sure you can tell from the one line entry last night I was pretty emotional. To be honest I went through several emotions last night. I think the first one was anxiety about weighing in. I even left work a few minutes early so I could get to the WW meeting earlier. Then I was in shock. In shock because I really and truly believed that I was going to hit the 50 pound mark this week. Then I was frustrated. I cried a lot in this stage. I was still at WW and I was trying hard to not be noticed, thankfully my WW leader did notice and she pulled me to the side after the meeting (I was trying to dash out so no one would see me crying). We had a good talk and I felt better after that. I still cried when I got to the car. Once I got home I went through a time of feeling ok. Justin and I ate dinner and then did DDR for about 10 minutes. After that I told him everything that had happened. Again more tears. After our talk I felt inspired so I danced a little more while he worked on the computer. Then I honestly started to feel angry. I got angry at the computer first because it erased my blog entry that I had typed up. And once again a lot more tears. Poor Justin, he is so good to me. He just held me and let me cry. At one point he told me I needed to stop typing in my blog for the night because I was mad and typing things out of anger. Good advice. I feel that this entry is much better. Justin was able to calm me down and he rubbed my back and played with my hair for the rest of the evening.

So you may be wondering about the whole goal of 60 pounds by December 31^st. Well according to my WW leader it is still attainable; I just need to work really hard. We decided that my body has got used to the amount of exercise I do so I need to do more or work harder during the time that I do work out. One thing that she said was that I can get to my goal, but will I be happy with reaching 55 pounds by December 31^st and then getting to the 60 pounds goal in January. I said yes. So while I am going to strive to still reach the 60 pounds, I will be happy with 55 pounds. I am scared though. I have a lot of Christmas parties to go to and then we are going to Florida for Christmas. Thankfully Justin’s family is very nice and understanding and I am sure will do things to help me with the WW while we are there. I have told Justin that if we eat out this month I can only go to places that I know the points of the food. I can’t take any chances. We have decided that for at least on of the Christmas parties we (or at least I will) eat dinner before hand so I don’t give in to things that I can’t figure out the points to.

Ok, so that is about it. It is a long one today, but I feel better after typing this out. Please pray more than ever for me. Not just that I can get to my goal, but that I won’t give up and that I can continue on after my goal is reached. Because I know that this is only one hurdle I will have to jump in this journey. There will be plenty more I am sure!

I won't lie...

I gained 8/10 of a pound. 

Can the goal be obtained?

So today I walked at lunch, which felt good. The last two days I have been using these bike pedals that I got for Christmas. They just sit on the floor; obviously there is not a bike involved. I thought I better give myself a break from that, although I still did it while I was on hold to an insurance company!

A lady who we refer people to at work, walked by my office and said “you’ve lost a lot of weight, haven’t you?” Of course I told her the exact amount of 48.6 pounds! It is always nice when people can tell you have lost, it makes all your hard work worth the effort!

I am hoping that tomorrow at weigh in I will be able to say I have lost 50 pounds. I am trying not to think to hard on it. I am thinking though that if I don’t get to 50 pounds this week that my 60 pounds by December 31st may not happen. Although, that is ok, because I am still so much farther than I was last year at this time! I will still try though. I suppose it can be done if I work really hard! We are going to Florida for Christmas and I told Justin that I will have to weigh in while we are there. I don’t want to fall off track and the meetings really help with keeping on track.

Oh, I have some good news to share! But I can’t share it in my blog. If you know my email you are welcome to email me and I will share it with you!!! (I should probably mention that it is not about me)

another good week...

Ok, so lot's to update!  I lost 1 pound this week!  Weight Watchers was closed on Thursday since it was Thanksgiving, so I weighed in on Wednesday.  I was pretty excited about the loss, seeing how I celebrated Christmas on Monday and ate out a lot with my family this week.  I had my follow up visit with my doctor.  Everything went down!!!  This was very good news.  I was very pleased as was my doctor.

On to better news.  My friend had her baby and she is so cute.  I can't wait to go down and see her.  Also, my brother and his family have been in town and that was fun and exhausting!  We got in all the time we could with them.  Ok, well I guess that is all.  Have a great week and remember to be thankful!

Give me a break, give me a break, break me off a piece of that...(now you all want a kit kat bar, don't you?)

Well I weighed in on Thursday and was a little disappointed because I gained 2/10 of a pound.  I know that doesn't sound like a lot, but when you have a goal to reach it is just 2/10 of a pound too much!  I am ok with it though (despite being disappointed, I think I can be both).  I felt like I did real good this week and the most important thing is that I was healthy.  So I am good.

Here is an exert from the Bible study book that the ladies in my FLOCK at church are reading.  It is really inspiring and I would encourage everyone to buy it and read it today! (FYI - it is called 'Balance that works when life doesn't', by Susie Larson)

"The heavens are bursting with blessing, provision, and promise.  God waits for us and longs to bless us.  Every time we look up and call on Him to influence our lives, He will.  Every time we go without something for the purpose of seeking Him more, we will receive far more than we gave up.  When we embrace every sacred moment that comes our way as a chance to love God more, listen to His voice and do what He says, our life becomes a living, breathing example of Christ's continued work on earth.  To be nourished by the Most High God is our greatest privilege.  It's what gives us the strength to do things that are far beyond us."

feeling good...

I really wanted to bring the book we are reading for our women’s Bible study to work with me today so I could quote some things from it. I guess this will have to wait until tonight because I left it at home! I would however, like to thank Rebecca for encouraging all of us to start reading a little each day, because I am really enjoying it this way rather than rushing through it like I usually do!

I weigh in tonight and I think that no matter what the out come I will be ok because I feel like I have done a lot better this week. Of course I would be thrilled to loose, but seriously I am ok with anything! I will let you know what the out come is as soon as I can!

Psalm 46:10

God has been telling me today over and over that I need to “Be still and know that I am God”. All day long I have been saying this part of Psalm 46:10 in my head. So much is going on today. I think the thing that is most consuming me is that my best friend is having some “troubles” with her pregnancy. She is due to be induced on Tuesday, but they might do it earlier because of all that is going on. I feel as though I should be continually in contact with her, and yet God keeps telling me to “Be still and know that HE is God”. What an amazing thought! He is God! He knows the things we are going through and all that is on our heart. He longs for us to cry out to him and yet I am learning this week that He longs for us to be still and listen to him speak! I feel like things are so chaotic this week, which makes this such a hard lesson to be learning. This week I want to strive to listen and not make things all about me! I want to read my ladies Bible study book a little each day. Most of all I want to be still!

FYI

By the way I have to give props to Anna Davis who took the new pictures that I have posted on my blog! She did a great job. I told her that when I get to my goal weight (final goal) that I want her to take pictures of me and Justin again! She did a great job!

the good life...

I have the most wonderful husband in the world! Today he brought me flowers to my work and then took me to lunch! How sweet is that! I love him so much! I really needed him today and he did this! I didn’t even tell him that I was having a hard day!

I get blood work done tomorrow. I am not looking forward to it, but hey, I guess it needs to be done. I will keep you updated on what I find out. I go back to the doctor next Tuesday to get the results.

I LOVE MY HUSBAND!

quick update

I lost 3 pounds! I am busy at work though, so I need to go! Will write more later!!!

I need to be reminded...

My blessings list:

God

Justin – the best husband in the entire world

My family – I can honestly say that I have been blessed with the cutest nieces and the cutest nephew!

Job – I really do have a great job, with a good boss and co-workers

Church family – I think that I have the best Church Family, one of which cannot be replaced with any church in Oklahoma (sorry this is actually supposed to be a subliminal message for one of my friends, but it is true) : )

Clothes to wear

Food to eat

Car to drive

Computer to use

Bible to read

Weight to lose (I don’t know how this is a blessing, but I feel it will be one some day, perhaps as a help to others)

Encouraging friends

Radio to listen to

Cell phone

House to live in – not only just a house, but it is a nice house too!

Clean water to drink

(I may add to this list as the day goes on, but I just needed a reminded of how blessed I am).

slacking

Not only am I slacking with keeping up my blog, but I am also slacking on the weight loss! I realized today that I have an appointment to get blood work done next week and I have been eating horribly and working out, well let's not even go there!

Please keep praying for me to get back into gear!

good week...

I lost 1 pound this week! Yeah! I am currently at 44.8 pounds lost. Not back up to my highest, but getting there.

I have discovered (and I actually mean my husband discovered it) some amazing pretzels! They are made by Snyder's and they are called butter snaps. Oh my gosh, they melt in your mouth. (I might be exaggerating, but seriously they are good)! I can have 24 for only 2 points! Also, Dole has fruit cups that come with fruit and yogurt. Those are good as well.

I have been sleeping better this week, which is great news! I guess it was on Tuesday I asked for people to pray that I slept good and boy did I! It was amazing. I woke up on time and everything!

Alright, only 15.2 pounds to go to reach my goal. Please keep praying for me to not give in to things like candy and well other bad for you kinds of things. Also, please pray that I will get back on my work out routine. While I did work out more this week than last week, I still should have done more. I didn't walk for three of the days this week, but at least on two of those days we did DDR in the evening. Ok, well I guess that is if for now. Looking forward to being able to say 60 pounds lost!!!!