Why do I feel I can eat more?

I don't know what it is about Friday's but I tend to eat more at lunch then I usually do. I think it must be because it is the day after weigh in day. Well today I ate a cheeseburger from the deli downstairs and some fries. I did leave about 10 or so fries and did not eat them! I am trying to look at the good stuff.

I am putting a picture of my oh so cute nephew on here. This may sound funny, but him and my two nieces are part of my weight loss inspiration. I figure the more weight I loose then the more I can run around and play when I babysit.

Holy cow! I lost!!!!

God is so truly amazing, because the past two weeks I have been convinced that I would not lose weight, and yet here I am 41.2 pounds lighter than I was last summer! I also wouldn't be here if it weren't for my wonderful and supportive husband. My love tank is so full right now ;) So anyways, I did lose 2 more pounds this week! Donut sticks and all! I just need to remember not to get to comfortable and stop tracking or working out. I think sometimes I tend to get a little big headed when I lose and I didn't expect it. I tend to think ' oh well sense I lost this week I can eat whatever I want' but that is not how it works my friend.

So I guess that is it for today. Thanks for all of your positive comments. I love that people are actually reading this!

What do I want?

Nothing sounds good to me right now and yet all I keep thinking about is food. It is like I am determined to find something that sounds good to me! I am not hungry, I mean I just got done eating lunch! Stupid food and stupid not hungry, hungry feeling!

no title

It is once again Thursday and I go to weigh in tonight. And once again I feel as though I will have gained. I will let you know how it goes. Even if I gain this week, I need to remember that I have lost over 35 pounds still and that is something worth feeling good about!

So yesterday, while I did track my points, I had some things from the vending monster! I had donut sticks and peanut butter M & M’s. I guess the good thing is that I at least wrote the points down, instead of just ignoring the fact that I ate them.

I am still so tired! I did not want to get up this morning. The thing I don’t understand is that I feel like I am getting good sleep, I guess just not enough.

I'm a pepper, a Dr. Pepper!

Oh my gosh! I gave in today and I drank…wait for it…a Dr. Pepper!!!! A real Dr. Pepper, not diet, not caffeine free (do they make caffeine free?). The first taste was so fabulous I had to start writing about it. Ok, mmm, I just had the second drink and it was just as good! Don’t worry, I won’t make you sit here and read about every sip I take. I just had to inform you that it was wonderful.

can't sleep, yet oh so tired

It is 10:20 pm and I have been so tired the last week, and yet I can't go to sleep! You would think that since I work at a sleep lab and all that I would be able to fix this problem. Oh well. I guess I will just learn to work and be tired at the same time. Although today I messed up several times at work. Thankfully I fixed it before it mattered. It also affects my weight. I tend to not want to work out or eat right. Lord, please close my eyes. I need rest more that you can imagine!

snooze please

So I have been SO tired this week. This morning I hit snooze for 15 minutes! Then finally got up and went to church. It has pretty much been a boring weekend, which is actually nice. Although our FLOCK (Sunday school) got together and played a little American Idol Karaoke and DDR. That was lots of fun! I really have nothing much to say so I suppose I will end this entry now. This is a picture of Justin, breaking it down, on Saturday night!

Praise God from whom all blessings flow!

I lost 4/10 of a pound! Which was a great surprise since I thought I was going to have gained. Thank you Lord for giving me great encouragment through family and friends.

Stupid car

So this morning I was fixing to leave for work and I got in my car and it wouldn't start! So I called Gieco and had them come out and jump it but it wouldn't hold the charge. Dang that Ford Escort! Well we thought it was the alternator so we had it towed to a mechanice that my Step-Dad uses, thankfully he checked it out first because it turns out that it was my break light staying on all the time. So they are replacing the battery and fixing the light. My smart husband has said all day that it might not be the alternator, but everyone we talked to said "well if it won't hold a charge it is the alternator". He is so brilliant!

So I go to weigh in tonight. I am all prepared to have gained since I didn't do so well on Monday. I have done well the last two days though and today even. Justin and I have been at my mom's house all afternoon waiting for my car to be fixed so we went on a little walk. I will let you know how I do.

Insprirational song

So today at lunch I was really debating on if I was going to walk after I was finished eating. So I finally decided to go ahead and walk, even if it were slowly that would be better than nothing. So I started and I turned on my phone/MP3 player and started listing to Barlow Girls. The song called Mirror came on and it just really inspired me. Maybe someday I will figure a way to put it on the blog so others can listen, but for now the lyrics will just have to do...

Mirror, Mirror on the wall; Have I got it?
'Cause Mirror you've always told me who I am
I’m finding It’s not easy to be perfect
So sorry, you won’t define me
Sorry, you don’t own me

Chorus
Who are you to tell me
that I’m less than what I should be?
Who are you? Who are you?
I don’t need to listen
to the list of things I should do
I won’t try; I won’t try
You don’t define me; You don’t define me

Mirror I am seeing a new reflection
I’m looking into the eyes of He who made me
To Him I have beauty beyond compare
I know He defines me

I am actually getting teary eyed just reading the last three lines! I hope this inspires others as it really did make me walk harder!

Blood Work

So I went to my doctor today to see how my blood work turned out. Overall I guess things were well. My good cholesterol was up (which is a good thing) and my overall cholesterol was in the normal range. My triglycerides were up from last time, which isn't good, but it is still better than when I first started the blood work stuff back in April or May. Unfortunately he didn't have all the pages from the lab so I wasn't able to find out about my insulin. He is supposed to call me and let me know once he receives it.

Yesterday wasn't so good. I ate Sonic for lunch and then had an appetizer party with the ladies from my Sunday School. I ate too much during and after they were there! But I guess I can find a silver lining and say that I did not open the bag of double stuffed oreo's that were brought! I love oreo's! Especially the double stuffed ones. So all and all I guess it wasn't too bad. Today is a new day and I will do my best to not over eat and to track my points and work out, because I am worth it!

Mazzio's (now how do you pronounce that?)

This weekend has been ok. On saturday, hmm what did I do on Saturday, well let's see...I volunteered at the pregnancy center. I remembered to bring lot's of snacks this time, so I was good as far as not getting hungry goes. Of course friday I was dreaming of the chocolate cake and what else did they have there at the center but chocolate cake! And yes I had a piece, it was 3 points and YUMMY! I enjoyed every bite of it! The rest of the day was good. I had a sandwich for lunch and pizza for dinner.

Sunday was great! Justin lead the study in our Sunday School. He did a great job, of course! He is so wonderful. Then the class went to Mazzio's. Probably a buffet was not the way to go for someone on weight watchers, but it helped that one of the ladies, Haley, in our Sunday School class is a lifetime member of Weight Watchers. We talked about WW just about the whole time, it kind of kept me from getting up more than once. Oh and her and her husband have as son that is very cute!

So tomorrow I am hosting our ladies Bible study, only we aren't doing a Bible study. We are having an appetizer party. I hope to do good and not go to wild on the food. I will let you know how I do. Well I guess that is all for know. Just a lot of boringness this weekend.

Stop typing!

Have you ever been at work and had stuff to do, but still be totally bored? Well that is how I am right now. To make it worse, when I get like this I start to think of food. Like right now I am thinking how great a piece of chocolate cake would be, not just your plain jane chocolate cake, I am talking cake with multiple layers of chocolate! Oh, (sigh) that would be wonderful! But alas, I am trying to avoid eating something (not that I have access to a cake like that right now, but there are chocolate donuts in the vending monster). Ok, so I am going to go back to work and not think about the cake or any food for that matter. Right, this is what I am going to do, that means I have to stop typing now. Ok stop typing, stop typing stop typing! (true Friends fans will recognize that this is a quote from Ross) Ok seriously I am ending this right now!

Did not give in!

Well today at work some of the ladies decided to go to Olive Garden for lunch. They asked if I wanted to go, and I did not give in. Not that Olive Garden is bad in and of itself, but I don't know the points there. So I stayed in the office and ate my leftovers from Texas Roadhouse, which were quite filling, actually! I didn't think it would be, but I am feeling pretty satisfied right now. Plus, I am going to eat at Chili's tonight and I want to make sure I have enough points for that.

On a totally different subject...Did anyone happen to see that picture that was on Yahoo! today about the miners that died in Utah? It was of a 10 year old girl crying. It made me want to cry. It was so terribly sad.

Again, I want to brag on my wonderful husband. I got home last night from my WW meeting and he had a little gift all wrapped up for me! It was so cute, he got me a frog that when you put it in water it grows! For those of you who know me, I like anything frog, except real ones. He hit the nail right on the spot with that one!

Another good one!

I weighed in and the verdict is....-2 pounds! That makes a grand total of 38.8 pounds lost! That is equvelant to 155.2 sticks of butter! (I got that off the weight watchers website!) I litteraly dropped my mouth open when I looked down at my weight book and saw that I had lost 2 more pounds!

After the meeting tonight Justin and I headed off to Texas Roadhouse. The last time we went there I told him I wanted it to be a non-weight watchers date! This time, however I ordered good. Although, I did eat too much. But we have to look at it as one battle won, since I didn't order the yummy cheesy smoke house burger! I ordered grilled shrimp! (I hate to say though that I did order fries. You can't eat there and not order their yummy fries and dip it in their yummy steak sauce!) Then after running in to some friends of ours from church (a little shout out to Brady and Jay), we headed to walmart. Now then, while I do not count that as activity points I do count it as a good work out! (I learned from past weeks that when I counted that as activity points I ended up not doing much else as far as working out goes). Then once we got home from Walmart we did a little Dance Dance Revolution! I was worn out though and only made it through 4 songs. But a little is better than nothing! (By the way my wonderful husband is awesome at DDR, he got 2 double A's with rings, which as far as we know is the highest score!)

Tonight's the night!

Well tonight I go in for my weekly weigh in! I am not sure how it will turn out. I wasn't as faithful with the exercising this week. Really I only worked out once per day. Mainly because my legs were SO sore (did I spell that right?). They are feeling better now, so I will have to get back on track! I did track my points this week, so at least I didn't stop that. I will let you know how it turns out tonight as soon as I can!

Blood work

I had blood work done this morning. So please pray that everything is lower that needs to be lower! I will find the results out next Tuesday. I will keep you updated on what I find out.

Burnt Muffins, mmm

So a person, who shall remained unnamed, in the office across the hall put a muffin in a plastic container into the microwave for 2 minutes and 50 seconds, let me mention that the directions said 25 seconds! The whole floor now smells like burnt popcorn, only worse, more like burnt hair! I HAD to leave the office for lunch. So I didn't get my daily walk in, but I did ok at lunch and ate a grilled chicken Caesar salad! MMM. And some soft serve ice cream, which I probably could have done without, but hey it was yummy! The smell was even worse when we got back though! Ewe! It kind of makes me want to throw up when I walk into the halls!

And I'm back

I just got done with my walk and I am so very tired. Justin and I worked in the yard last night and I raked leaves and cut the hedges and that really wore me out. I think that I am feeling the effects from yesterday today.

I have decided to make a different goal. I am still aiming towards the 60 pounds by December 31st, but I have decided that each week if I weigh less than I did the week before than I have accomplished my goal. So even if it is 1/10 of a pound less than the week before, than that is worth celebrating!

Weekend

Wow, I can't believe I went all weekend with out posting! This weekend was ok. Weekends are always hard because I don't have my same schedule as I do during the week. It is hard to keep track of points because I am not right in front of the computer all day. But overall I think I still did ok this weekend.

I am trying to keep my snacks down in the morning, because I tend to eat more in the morning then I do in the afternoon. And now that I can eat one less point, I want to make sure I still have enough for dinner and lunches. If I can start eating more veggies that have no points like fresh broccoli or carrots, I should be fine. It is hard to eat that kind of stuff with out ranch dressing though. Well wish me luck and keep praying for me to be strong!

less points, more filling

So I now can have one less point each day since I have lost more weight. (pretty much every ten pounds my points go down, this won't happen forever, but for a while). This may not seem like a lot, but really it is. It takes a little bit of time to get used to, but that is what flex points are for! (these are 35 extra points that you get in a week, I like to call them the just in case points)

I am so excited because this weekend Justin and I are going to take some clothes to be altered! You have no clue how good that feels to not just keep the fat clothes just in case.

Drum roll please....

I lost 5.6 pounds this week!!!!!! Whoo Hoo!!!!!! That makes the total 36.8 pounds!!!!! I am so pumped!!!!!!!!! I got a gold 5 star to remind me that I made it another 5 pounds!!! Eek, I am so excited!!!

No more water!

I have finished my water for the day! I usually try and stop drinking water around 4ish on my weigh in days. That way by the time I weigh I can use the restroom first and weigh less then if it were still in my system. (I hope that isn't too gross sounding) My day today was pretty busy this morning, but now it is 3:30 and I have nothing to do at work! I don't know why we have been so slow lately, but hey I ended up going to the Weight Watchers website and if you are a member you can do some online video work outs! It was fun. But you can only exercise so much before you absolutely get worn out!

Have I mentioned today that I have a wonderful husband? Well I do! Last night I made grilled cheese sandwiches for dinner (I know so gourmet) and of course his turned out ok, but I burnt mine! I was kind of upset the rest of the night. He later asked me how many points I had left and I said 9 and he asked if I wanted him to go and get me a hot fudge sundae from McDonald's (which I have been wanting for a while, but haven't had points for when I wanted it)! So of course I took him up on that offer! He is so wonderful! I love him very much, I hope that you women out there can find one as good as him, only I am afraid I have the best one out there, so you will have to settle for second best!

Lunch time...

So the girls at work are going to Wendy's today, I politely declined and I am currently heating up my Healthy Choice meal of Herb chicken with potatoes and veggies. I figured since it is weigh in day and all, I should really be good. I have the points for Wendy's but Justin and I always celebrate my weight loss by going out to Applebee's or someplace that I know the points at.

We did Dance Dance Revolution again last night! My legs sure are filling it! I guess that is a good thing. Well I am off to eat and then walk for 20 minutes. This day should be a good one. I am really excited about weighing in tonight! Hopefully, I won't be disappointed.

Not easy...

So I was on my way to work this morning and I realized that this weight loss thing is not going to be easy. I gave in this morning and weighed on my home scales, it looks good. The thing is though, I have been working really hard this week. Working out two times a day, keeping track of my points, blah, blah, blah! It hasn't been easy! And there won't be a point in my life were I can just not do this, if I stop I will start to gain it back. It is tough. But I must keep going and not give up. Today I have already had half of my first 32 ounces of water. And it is barley even 9am! I weigh in tomorrow so I will be able to give you an answer on whether or not all this has paid off. I am sure it has!

Another one down

Another good day. I danced tonight with Justin, by brilliant husband. That was fun, except I ended up tearing my pants! Not because I didn't fit in them, but because they were pulled in a weird direction and then I bent over! Agh, that was one of my last pair of scrub pants that fit good! I guess it is time to go ahead and get my larger ones altered! Whoo hoo! So now that I have shared an embarrasing moment with you all I will end this blog. Feel free to leave comments too, I would love to know that you were here! Sleep well.

On a role!

So far so good today! I walked again at lunch for 20 minutes. Last night Justin and I did Dance Dance Revolution for about 15 minutes, so that was good! Once again I ate my healthy choice meal that I brought. It was good, but it was 9 points, which I think is high for a lunch. But it was still good. Ok, well I am going to go back to work now. Enjoy your day! I know I will :)

Well Done!

So today I did well! I counted my points all morning, which it seems as though I eat the most between breakfast and lunch. You would think I would eat more between lunch and dinner, hmm. Oh well. Ok, so counted my points...I ate what I brought for lunch, a healthy choice meal. Then I walked for about 20 minutes after I ate. It was great. Then for dinner I went to Chili's with the Women's Bible Study from Church. Chili's is great since they are in my Weight Watchers book. I got Chicken Fajitas and instead of using tortilla's I used lettuce. It was yummy! I did give in and eat some chips and salsa before our food came. I am not sure how to count that as points. I am hoping that when Justin gets home he will want to do a little dance, make a little oh wait a minute lets keep it PG! Seriously though Dance Dance Revolution is awesome! I think everyone should buy it!!!!! Ok, that is all for now. I am just waiting for my hubby to get home from his men's Bible study. I am not usually home before him, you know women, we can TALK!!

doing good

So thus far today I have done well. I have kept track of my points and after lunch I walked for 20 minutes! I also remembered to park in the farthest parking space today at work. I usually feel better after walking and today is no exception! I wish I would just remember that on the days I don't feel like walking. It really gives you a boost of energy, and it is safer than an energy drink! :) I am realizing that this blog is more for my sake. It is helping me, kind of like a journal, only everyone has access to it! Seriously though it has been nice.

Lovely Day

Today was a beautiful day! The weather was wonderful and I did well with watching my points. I had a salad at Johnnies, which by the way was wonderful! Then for dinner I had a BBQ chicken sandwich with potato wedges from KFC. Plus Justin and I got to go swim at my mom and Steve's house, which was very nice since it was HOT outside.

So I discovered that I do my best thinking while at night while trying to go to sleep. The bad thing is, is that once I get to a point that I can sit down at the computer and type it all out, I can't remember a single thing I thought. So tonight my goal is to try and remember what I think of while in bed, perhaps I should write it down so I can share my wonderful wisdom with all of you. Or perhaps that is why God doesn't let me remember, because it is not so wise!

I know I am supposed to be writing about my weight loss journey and all, but I would just like to add a side note here...I love my husband! He is truly the most wonderful man in the world. All my life I have prayed that God would provide me with a Christian man, but Justin has surpassed all my expectations. For instance, he currently is memorizing Bible verses and has already memorized at least 12 or so. He is amazing. I love him, I love him, I love him! Oh, and to make this about my weight loss, he constantly encourages me with this. He tells me that he loves me regardless of if I lose or not. By the way, he has a blog too, and you can see the link to it on the side of my page. You should read it!

yes second tiem in one day

I highly doubt most people post more than one blog in a day, but I am bored. I am sitting at work and since my office manager is out for the day I have nothing to do since I am so caught up. I have literally pushed my check mail button a thousand times! And of course when I am bored I think about food. What else! I really want a sprite right now, but that is actually something I don't mind resisting. Perhaps having this blog will distract me long enough so that I don't go and get something from the....AGH....vending machine!!! The horrible monster that calls your name! You know what I am talking about. I guess they have been putting a few healthy choice items in there, like pretzels. But seriously why can't they be like chocolate covered pretzels :o Oh wait that wouldn't be good, well it would tast good, it just wouldn't be the best choice is what I should say.

Seriously, donuts?

Why? Why do people bring donuts and things to tempt me? I wasn't going to give in, but 15 minutes before lunch what do I do...walk into the kitchen at work and eat a donut! I wasn't hungry, I don't know why I even ate it, especially this close to lunch.

Let me just tell anyone who is on the verge of being over weight... DON'T give in to eating stuff when you don't need it. You may be alright now, but then 26 years later you realize your severely obese and don't look anything like you did 10 or 15 years ago. I wish that I would have listened to my doctors back then. Of course at that point I wasn't pre-pre diabetes. Which I am now. This is what got me going with the weight watchers stuff. Well that and my wedding, but really it was the doctor telling me I am on the verge of becoming pre-diabetes. That really scared me.

Ok, well I am going to keep going today and count my points. I need to exercise. Maybe my oh so wonderful husband will do a little dance dance revolution with me tonight. (actually he is always asking me to do it with him). This is a great form of exercise.

Agh, number two

Well tonight stunk because I weighed in and gained. I kind of expected it though because I have been sick since last saturday and I haven't kept the same eating or exercising schedule. The good news is I am still above 30 pounds. Plus I have a wonderful husband who has spent the last hour or more rubbing my back and massaging my head and it has helped my headache go away.

My weight watchers leader has challenged us each week to do stuff. For example one week she said our challenge was to drink our water, then the next week was to keep track of our points. Well so this week she has challanged us to go through a room in our house or office and make it weight watcher friendly. This is a bit of a challenge for me. Ido have a problem with getting rid of things we have paid for and not used.

So this entry is going to come to an end as my headache is comming back. Have a great weekend!

My first Blog!

I have decided to post a blog so that all of you may join me in my weight loss journey. With the help of Google and my wonderful husband, I begin this blog...

My name is Jessica and I am an over eater. There I said it! I am currently on a quest to conquer this bad habit. I am doing Weight Watchers, which is a great program. Thus far I have lost 32.4 pounds. I have been on this journey my entire life, but in April 2007 I began to get serious. My husband is an amazing encouragement! He is always telling me that he loves me, weight loss or not. But I must say there is nothing like seeing his proud smile when I come home on Thursdays after my weight watcher meetings and tell him I have lost!

I must admit there is a part of me that is scared. Why? you ask. Well this is who I have been all my life. I have always been the"fat friend". It is what I know. I wonder if I will still be me, do I really know who "me" is? Will I still make people laugh or will I loose all my funniness when I loose the weight?

Ok, well I suppose this will be it for my first entry. Thanks to all who are sharing in this journey. It helps to share this as it keeps me accountable.